Thursday, December 20, 2007

hug me? I think not! ;)

Saturday, April 28, 2007

hug me? I think not! ;)

Dear everybody,

On the subject of hugging, I have decided to abstain until marriage. Even then it should be done in the privacy of one's own home, as all forms of PDA are indecent and not proper for Christians to take part in. In our culture, hugging leads to smoking which leads to drinking which leads to card playing which leads to sex which leads to dancing. So, you see, hugging is the root of a multitude of sins including that heinous sin of dancing. 12 hugs a day? I should think not. The nerve of some people.

Incidentally, becoming a missionary and going through missionary training also leads to card playing, so it is obvious that becoming a missionary belongs somewhere on that slippery slope. The is further proven by spontaneous occurrences of salsa dancing and talk of dance parties while at missionary training.
For further information on the physical and spiritual consequences of hugging ask Brittney to forward the informational public service message I sent her on the connection between plague-carrying rats and people who hug too often. Am I the only voice of morality that has made it through the chicanery of missionary training?

(Some guy named Zach wrote this and we refer to it all the time! this is our life...!)

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